6/16/09

Whatever happened, happened




Things I hadn’t done before:
(in chronological order as I can possibly remember)

Exactly three weeks ago I fell out of love with traveling abroad. I am not quite sure what it was, but there was just something stopping me from enjoying it as much as I used to so I decided to swap the groovy international trips for the Hungarian hills with some friends of mine.

I didn’t have to fly through a 10-hour starry night as I had done before to get to another continent, but I took my lucky blanket (which was stolen from an Aerosvit flight in Moscow) to keep me safe and warm just in case I had to sleep barefoot out in the open at 280 meters altitude.

I bought a pair of cheap flip flops (with the intention of throwing them away after the journey) but I forgot to take my pajamas. I even left my toothbrush at home. The only thing I had with me was a nice birthday cake. Because friends are always friends even if they refuse to eat their birthday cake because of a crazy never-ending diet.

I made fire for the other girls because they had no idea how to do it (thanks to the summer I spent in a YMCA camp) mixed cocktails by myself and climbed over the front gate when the half of the group was so drunk that they forgot to let the other half inside.

I dared to join my friends and visited the cottage of an old scatterbrained professor - who was really really nice - and watched the sunset at the Danube bend from his huge balcony. I saw light being poured down over the dawning sky and realized that it was much more than the artificial ones from Photo Shop.

I became inspired by the view so I walked down 200 steps to get a bunch of lavender for myself and almost blacked out from the height when I tried to climb back up.

I saw people in a local pub who could talk about anything to anyone walked home on sidewalks whose stones were worn from all the feet that stood on them and I realized roads could be made anywhere.

I woke up early in the morning and I was longing for a hot shower but not only was there no hot water but there was no water at all. I put my dirty clothes back on and realized that I had two blisters and four bruises from my evening trek.

I went to the Museum of an old Sailorman by myself to find the magic wand that makes all your dreams come true and I decided to ask for something which could never happen.

I had my heart broken, but it was still worth it, as I discovered that I could bear pain and that I can always go a little bit further figured out that I would stop losing things once I learnt not to miss them anymore.

So please, don’t ask me "How was your last trip? Where are you traveling next time?". Because I am not going anywhere. But you… you’ve got to do it. Or do whatever has been on your mind for quite some time but you still haven’t done it yet. Don’t wait until you retire and have the money to live your dreams because you will have difficulty leaving your beloveds and walking miles on your own.

I am staying here. And I still want to get a henna tattoo but have no idea who to do it for. I desire to learn how to play my guitar. I want to go to Sri Lanka, and get married in Bali one day. I want to climb a huge mountain or at least a climbing wall. I am desperate to travel with my friends again and I should definitely forgive the ones who hurt me in the past.

I don’t know why I wrote this… I just wanted to write. Even if it was too late I had the urge to write and the feeling got hold of me. But by the time I got home from the hills, I had forgotten half of the things on my mind and honestly it doesn’t seem to be such a smart idea anymore.

The things I saw I cannot show to you. But the people I love were on my mind. I saw you with me and all my love was sent to each and everyone of you.